A 100 days to a new me: Day 91 going through negativity

The last day ended or to say, this day started with a discussion with a close friend.I sensed the same loneliness, the same insecurities that every person past a certain dreaded age number goes through. She is so beautiful, so pure and so magical and she just said to me, maybe we do not love ourselves enough…hence we get into trouble. Well I do, now  :). But honestly the quest for love can be so debittling it’s not funny.Saddest thing, people who are married can go and pass any kind of a remark on you, if you are dating, if you are simply looking or even if you are single. I have had friends who have been supportive, the strangest of people who have been there, understood and the people closest to you, who are making these remarks; people who you thought were on your side, people whose sides you have never left whatever may have occurred. It is very easy to sermonise when things are going okay with you, so okay to be self-righteous because life has given you a fairer deal.When things like that happen it sears you apart, honestly it makes you wonder if you want to live in a world like this. And these are people you do not want to move away from because you love them, it’s people who are doing well in life in every sense but the grudge you your happiness.For what…Sadly it’s people you cannot move away from because the bonds extend to others you have grown to love, or at times where the bonds naturally extend to people you are like your limbs.

These are challenging days and I know a lesson is round the corner…I know that I am walking through so much of negative emotion because you have to go through it for clearing. I remember someone who was going through a very spiritual phase, she went to this very holy place where she went through negative emotions, like she never had ever before…the answer was that she was releasing this energy.I lost my wallet with all my credit cards, got flicked on the metro; I came to hear of all negative things from a friend. I also got a chance to go and pray, a chance to enjoy the girls, a chance to talk to someone wonderfully nice…

The choice is mine what to pick, the negative or the positive from the day and for every ensuing day of my life; I choose positive.Yes the day was positive but I have to still deal with the whole negativity that I am going through this minute, I have to get past it and I shall…I shall 🙂




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