A 100 days to a new me: Day 21, Plagiarism and ‘no regrets’…love;)

Do listen to the song…No Regrets by Ellen Paife I also love the French version and also Shirley Bassey’s interpretation

******************

I am mad!(Oh! You all know it?) Well…really angry mad! This woman is copying my format and as I see it increasingly my style. Maybe I should be flattered I am doing something right..this is flattery! However I have a personality flaw…I am over conscientious and expect the same from people. (Oh! It’s called stupidity..is it?). Well to give her credit she has done cosmetic changes, and to think I tried to digress because I thought she was there first till I realized she is very new and is now a follower!…and she is now even copying my style of writing. I am so hopping mad!

Blogspot support is off till the US Thursday! I can’t see any-way to block her so, to start with, I am going to let out one virtual scream..eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…Ah! Relieved!

That out of the way, I have three choices: 1. Write a stupidly ridiculous blog, literally lead her up the monkey path. 2. Appeal to her better sense (if she had any she won’t do it in the first place) 3. Grin and bear it. Deep breath! Deep breath! Deep breath!

Anyway shall think when I can think straight! Right now I am in the steaming, ranting, venting stage.

To get on with life or re-cap Day 22?? ..and am as fat as ever!! Anyway Scene I Take II…to get on with life and re-cap Day 21.

For all those who, like me, feel romance is integral to a good story…I woke to MM’s email this morning. And now for the surprise ending…there is nothing to us ;).

It is always good to hear from him, there is a part of him which is really nice and easy going, can’t quite lay my finger on it but he has this comforting, peaceful feel to him. He is doing fine and has read a few relevant posts on my blog (which amounts to all of them).Well just when I thought he would not write back, I get this email about how busy he has been and more so about my open letter, my comment about regretting it and how regrets me regretting it. I have his permission for an open letter…Yes he is priceless…

“Dearest MM,
There were two things that need mention here from your email.  That  you regretted that I regretted my open letter to you, you felt that my letter was sweet and honest and more importantly that you felt that I in my open letter regret  “ that the relationship appears to have turned to be less significant than the possibility.”

I am happy I met you, I do not regret one moment of those two dates…not one, and what is there to regret? I also have not shed one tear because we could not be. Whatever was, for that semi-brief moment was sweet and cherishable, and the post the stunted possibility…it has still remained sweet and cherishable in its own way.I have zero regrets. I regret the lack of love per se, and I am human enough yet, to keep regretting that. I have,however, not put a face to that regret.

The odd question about the why not, does cross my mind fleetingly…I wonder what is the story behind what you said…I wonder was it that or was it something else. I also wonder about the whole mixed bag of questions I got from you.., which reflected some kind of a conflict within…yes I notice everything…So I do wonder , though in an emotionally removed, almost academic manner; maybe it is the writer in me.

I don’t know whether anything significant would have come out, I am acutely aware that reality starts where emotion ends, and in my case at this juncture in life, they mostly work together. So not for a moment did I hope for anything…not then not now, no I have no regrets.

The regret that I did convey was over the fact that I wrote that letter without consulting you.I am more contentious than most and here, I had failed myself rather than you…when I wrote without your permission.

You don’t have to regret that you made me regret and I do value you as the friend that you’re getting to be, supportive, non-judgmental. I do value you for all the good in you, but it was too early to either be sure or unsure. Maybe something significant could have come out…maybe not…it could easily have turned out to be a disaster…

You are priceless in your own way, as is Beluga caviar…but I don’t regret not having tasted it ..;)

Look forward to your reply..

G”

The day sandwiched between MM’s mails was hectic and full of work. It started with a mail from Ankur at 10am about the progress of the interview that finished at  Saturday 5pm! Clients J…I was somehow extremely tired through the day, felt as I was sleep walking.

Post lunch, was all about warming up my niece for the battle of words, the day after. When you are set in your style, it becomes very difficult to come down to the level of a child and teach. We did fine till the evening; post which I lost a bit of patience. It was only after she read a sentence wrong five times, I realized that the poor child was saturated. She was near tears, it took her a few hugs and promises of I would make it right for her, that placated her… and I would…

The evening ended did with more promises to myself, attempts at getting on with my flash fiction and  with another mail from MM… more about that later…

The sleep however was as dreamless as life…it served its purpose and served it well…

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s